A note on starting this blog
I’ll start this off by saying that I’m not used to writing a blog, and I’ve never really kept a diary. I can’t help but feel that I’m being self centred trying to document what I’ve been up to the past few weeks, especially at this point in time. So for that reason I want to start by acknowledging a few things that are impacting our lives at the moment.
Firstly, I’ve been engaging in the #BlackLivesMatter movement online everyday. I’ve been reading, watching docmentaries, and donating where I can, and I want to provide a link to resources where you can read about ways to help here. I’m saying this to acknowledge that I am not unaware of the situation, its devastating, and I don’t want to be silent. #BlackLivesMatter is not just happening now, because its a “hot topic”, this is ongoing, which means our work is ongoing, and this will stay relevant probably throughout our lifetimes. Right now I’m trying to learn as much as possible about how to be anti-racist and how to actively incorporate that into my everyday life and the conversations I have. In saying that, I know I can always do more. I think I can’t launch into a blog thats essentially just about me and my dance practice without first acknowledging that my voice is not the voice that needs to be amplified at the moment.
Secondly, the other thing that unfortunately needs to be acknowledged is that we are currently in the midst of a global pandemic. Covid-19 has affected everyone’s lives in totally different, and again devastating ways, and I want to also acknowledge that in the grand scheme of things I am in an extremely priveleged position. All of my family and friends are healthy, as am I, and I am with my family, safe in my childhood home. That doesn’t mean my life hasn’t been disrupted (everyone’s has) but in the grand scheme of things, I’m really doing absolutely fine. I’m saying this because I know not everyone is in a similar situation, some people have lost family members and friends and jobs. I can only work on my dance practice because I am in such a lucky and priveleged situation. Of course lockdown has been a really strange time, and my day to day life has completely shifted. I went from living in London in a flat with my partner, working in a cafe, a theatre and a dance studio, rehearsing in the evenings (and any spare days I had) and touring and performing dance work, to being at home everyday, navigating Zoom dance classes and trying to keep up the motivation to do so.
I also briefly want to touch on the fact that being productive right now is really hard. I have good days and bad days as most of us do, and I don’t want to give off the impression that I have been working non-stop everyday because that’s just untrue and it also perpetuates the idea that our worth as human beings can be measured by how productive we are, which is a mindset that I’m still struggling to change for myself.
I’m starting this blog now mainly to create an archive of my work whilst I am working from home. I am trying to take this time to keep fit, keep dancing, and exploring my habits and patterns particularly in relation to improvisation to music. I’ve come up with an idea for a project, and I’m so grateful to be supported by Citymoves to research my ideas. I’ll write in more detail about what I’ve been researching, but I couldn’t start this without acknowleding whats going on right now.
